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My Word from The Lord - 5/29/2008 10:02:19 AM
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sunshinesoprano
Posts: 1033
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Georgia
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Joy's post gave me the courage to post what God has recently revealed to me.
It may seem completely insignificant but, I'll share nonetheless.
My way of handling my life-long singleness turned from despair to denial over the past few years. It was just easier to pretend that it wasn't the road for me than to acknowledge the gaping hole in my heart.
Some of you may remember the vast revelation God gave me about 2 years ago after my group sang at a little church of God in Valdosta, GA. That was the beginning of my healing, but there were still other things that had to happen first.
As I mentioned in Joy's post, the enemy has always had me thoroughly convinced that because of my body of larger than ideal proportions, I was undesirable to men. That regardless of my great eyes, my hourglass shape, and loving personality, it was hopeless, simply because I didn't "look right." Give up, game over.
It didn't make it any easier that I'd actually been asked out once as a joke, and that the only people that seem to be attracted to me are married men whose trophy wives turn out to be duds.
It has haunted me my entire life. I've always thought if I could be a little thinner, a little prettier, a little more modern in my dress, or have a more outgoing personality with strangers and not get shy immediately, things might be different.
But, starting in the EARLY morning of May 19, something started happening.
My mom had kept my car while we went out of town to sing because it has functioning A/C and her's doesn't. We were waiting on the local Bi-Lo parking lot for her to meet us about 2ish in the morning and I made the comment, "My mom drives like a granny." John, our bass and fearless leader, who is like my big brother and ALWAYS making comments like this says, "She's just getting ready." I told him to hush and he repeated it again, quite non chalantly.
I thought nothing of it until the next week when almost every conversation I heard, every show I watched, every email I received, was about being a mom. And of course, being a mom comes with being a wife (at least ideally.
It was sort of wierd, I thought.
Then, as I was dealing with some old "stuff," and praying, the Lord spoke to me. It seems like it's almost always in the same place on the interstate He speaks, too...kinda wierd.
He said, "This isn't all about you. This is all about me. There is nothing YOU can do to make this happen or change your situation. Your looks, your personality, nothing. This one is in MY hands, and when it happens, it will be for MY glory. And it will be amazing."
It was sort of odd that I received it that way, because a friend of mine received a promise from God and had to wait many years for it to be fulfilled. She was always an inspriation to me, but my thoughts were always, "I don't have that promise. God never promised me anything. I don't have anything to hold on to."
Now I have a promise.
Interestingly, I went down to my old department to visit some friends yesterday at work and stopped by the desk of one who'd recently been married. We talked about some funny events and her "bridezilla" moment, when she changed the subject, looked at me and gave me a nod saying, "By the way...when are we going to get to plan your wedding?" I laughed and said as soon as someone found me a husband.
That was so out of the blue for Jenny to bring up because we'd never really talked about that before.
So now, I have a promise, and while I still fight the "you're too fat, too unattractive, too shy" voices in my head, I have something to hold on to. It feels like it's very close.
_____________________________
Pure Heart-Fresh, Progressive Southern Gospel
Sing, laugh, love, PRAISE!
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 5/29/2008 10:33:21 AM
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collie1
Posts: 708
Joined: 3/5/2007
From: The Place to Go: Idaho!!
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WOW!!! Thank you for sharing.
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 5/29/2008 10:39:32 AM
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woodwind228
Posts: 473
Joined: 5/8/2008
From: Atlanta
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Ya know, I think when we put our eyes and focus on God, rather than our singleness for example, then it gives Him more room to work in our lives. His timing is perfect. He knows the good purpose He has for us. His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts. We don't always understand why He does things the way He does, but there is always a purpose.
I love the passage in James 1:2-5
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
I don't know why that passage came to mind just now. Perhaps it'll encourage someone.
_____________________________
*~* Susan *~*
These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world. --John 16:33 KJV
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 5/29/2008 10:57:00 AM
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sunshinesoprano
Posts: 1033
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Georgia
Status: offline
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It's great, woodwind. That's a great passage.
Yeah, and it's interesting because I had an earlier revelation about something else related to that.
When PH was not singing as much, it was REALLY killing me. God reveled to me that my attitude had been:
Gospel Singer=Heather
When the truth is the following:
Singer+Nothing+Everything is NOT equal to Heather.
For over a decade, I had associated who I am with what I do...if I wasn't singing, I wasn't anything.
How horrible that I'd again, let the enemy convince me of something that made me so unhappy and depressed.
_____________________________
Pure Heart-Fresh, Progressive Southern Gospel
Sing, laugh, love, PRAISE!
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 5/29/2008 11:33:38 AM
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woodwind228
Posts: 473
Joined: 5/8/2008
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sunshinesoprano
It's great, woodwind. That's a great passage.
Yeah, and it's interesting because I had an earlier revelation about something else related to that.
When PH was not singing as much, it was REALLY killing me. God reveled to me that my attitude had been:
Gospel Singer=Heather
When the truth is the following:
Singer+Nothing+Everything is NOT equal to Heather.
For over a decade, I had associated who I am with what I do...if I wasn't singing, I wasn't anything.
How horrible that I'd again, let the enemy convince me of something that made me so unhappy and depressed.
So very true, Heather. Our identity is not in what we do, but who we are in Christ Jesus. We are saints. We are redeemed. We are righteous. We are justified. Our father is the Most High God!! We need to remember that God sees us as He sees Jesus. We are His children, redeemed through Jesus.
A quote from Tony Evans says this:
"The way you see yourself will lay the foundation for victory or defeat in your spiritual life. If you want victory in your day-to-day Christian experience, you must first of all have victory in your thinking. You must begin to think of yourself as a saint. That does not mean everything is perfect, but it means that you know who you are. You have the position and you need to gain victory over any sin or habit or thought pattern that is keeping you in bondage."
_____________________________
*~* Susan *~*
These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world. --John 16:33 KJV
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 6/1/2008 6:52:28 AM
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ebony101
Posts: 879
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: the big blue marble
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Yes woodwind, you are totally right.
_____________________________
'We're writing a gospel, a chapter each day,
By the things that we do & the words that we say.'
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 6/20/2008 5:02:19 AM
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Katie-Scarlet
Posts: 108
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
Then, as I was dealing with some old "stuff," and praying, the Lord spoke to me. It seems like it's almost always in the same place on the interstate He speaks, too...kinda wierd.
He said, "This isn't all about you. This is all about me. There is nothing YOU can do to make this happen or change your situation. Your looks, your personality, nothing. This one is in MY hands, and when it happens, it will be for MY glory. And it will be amazing."
It was sort of odd that I received it that way, because a friend of mine received a promise from God and had to wait many years for it to be fulfilled. She was always an inspriation to me, but my thoughts were always, "I don't have that promise. God never promised me anything. I don't have anything to hold on to."
Now I have a promise.
Thats a wonderful story thank you for sharing it. I'm glad you now have a promise to hold on to, its so very hard at times to hold on when you don't have a promise and you have no clue if its Gods will or not. Its like being in limbo. If you knew for a fact that it was his plan to be single forever then it would be eaisier to deal with day after day because you wouldn't have questions or expectations but not knowing sometimes its hard because you can't try to yield to his will when you don't no what that is. I'm still waiting to have a promise or to hear forever single.
I have had two different people tell me something but neither was very specific. One told me my breakthrough was right around the corner and the other told me if I wait on him I will get it. Well I accept that he has something for me but what the breakthrough is and what it is I will get if I wait no one has said. It could be anything. I would love to go out on my own and say they were talking about a husband but I been around the block to many times to play that game. Unless God specifically says husband I'll just wait and see what it actually is. I'm so not getting my hopes up like that been there done that got the wounded heart to show for it.
Anyway sorry I went on a little rant there. I am very glad you got your promise hold on to it and don't let it go. 
_____________________________
Satans job is 24hrs 365 days a year and he never takes lunch, vacation or has a sick day.
Are you ready to join the war? Know your enemy, prepare yourself.
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RE: My Word from The Lord - 6/20/2008 11:51:06 PM
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joy2give2u
Posts: 4960
Joined: 9/19/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline
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Sunshinesoprano I haven't posted in this thread before but I felt lead tonight to encourage you to hang unto the Word God gave you.........Trust what he said and he will do as he said.......
May God continue to speak to you......
With dailyjoy
Joy
_____________________________
God's Majesty seen through my eyes
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, the Bible tells us to renew our minds and to meditate on His Word (constantly). In so doing, we hide His Word in our hearts like He tells us to. AND...from the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. AND...by speaking the Word, we increase our faith (faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God). And if we increase our faith (shield of faith), we are strong and the devil "can't touch this". LOL
