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RE: Why Do Guys Say Things Like This??? - 8/7/2008 10:46:03 PM
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willfs
Posts: 332
Joined: 12/28/2007
Status: offline
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I want to make sure I have this correct. You both care about and love each other deeply. You guys see each other married one day. He just doesn't feel like he can commit because of some spiritual issues.
Here is why I have done those things (or similiar): I am fickle. I can't get up the motivation to really go after a girl. I find excuses all the time for not asking girls out who I have been interested in for years. I find excuses for not commiting to girls that I date. I find excuses for not marrying girls I commit to.
Some of my excuses have been: I have some spiritual/personal issues I need to address. I could easily tell her I want to commit some day. It was sooooo easy to talk about commitment. Talking about commitment is very easy for any guy. I can talk about asking girls out all day long but I never do. One friend said he never would talk about girls with me again because all I do is talk. I talk about marriage with girls I commit to but we never marry. The girls I commit to end up breaking up with me because I never marry them. The only girls I ever commited to were girls who went after me but they would only go after me for so long. I can talk about commitment all day long. I can talk about marriage all day long. I can talk about relationships all day long. The problem is, I can never commit.
I am fickle, non commital, and picky. Why am I so fickle, non commital, and picky? Someone please tell me!!!!!!
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RE: Why Do Guys Say Things Like This??? - 8/19/2008 7:13:37 PM
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gmc4Jesus
Posts: 227
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Torrance, California
Status: offline
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HisPen,
Like the others, it is hard to know what is going on in his head. One of my "Rules #1 is --"I can't get inside the other person's head to do their thinking for them".
Is this man treating you in a Godly and respectful way or is he trying to "get some milk without buying the cow"?
Some men are afraid to commit to a relationship because of fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of their own inadequacy. We will often try to hide that fear in "commitment" talk, but any real man knows that he can't do it on his own, without God.
Some men are afraid of God and church because so many churches are effeminate. If he can see strong male models in Christ and men in the church, that will help remove that issue.
Some men are so macho that they don't want to admit that they need God to help them deal with the issues of life.
I commend you for making a stand for your faith. It will be much harder to get him to church after you are married than it is now. You might want to pray about God leading you to a man who is already a committed Christian.
May God give you wisdom and favor as you sort through these issues and seek a Godly solution.
_____________________________
Let's talk about Jesus, His life and teachings at the www.gettingtoknowjesus.org Gospel Study Forum.
Home of "Getting To Know Jesus", a complete Bible study on the life and teachings of Jesus.
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