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RE: Baby Chat (take 3)

 
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[Poll]

Baby/Toddler Chat (take 3)


I love shirts with saying on them!!!
  0% (0)
I don't mind shirts with sayings on them
  3% (1)
It depends on the saying on the shirt whether I like it or not
  70% (19)
I generally don't like or dislike shirts with sayings
  3% (1)
I dislike shirts with sayings of any kind on them
  7% (2)
I refuse to buy them for my kids, but will accept them as gifts
  3% (1)
We don't allow them to be worn even if they were given it by someone
  3% (1)
My favorite saying on a shirt is...______
  3% (1)
My least favorite saying on a shirt is..._____
  0% (0)
I have no opinion
  3% (1)


Total Votes : 27


(last vote on : 7/9/2008 7:05:24 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:11:46 AM   
manda59


Posts: 5210
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
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Hmmmm, just wondering if your stop-lights are what we call traffic lights?

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"I have nothing to add, except to agree with Manda."
(agapetos, July 2008)
Post #: 26
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:14:27 AM   
Georgia-Peach


Posts: 1959
Joined: 6/2/2005
From: Georgia on my mind
Status: offline
(((Jae))) We had an incident where someone charged to our atm/debit card. Luckily it was only $300 and it got put right back into our account. Our bank was fantastic about the whole thing.

Ladies I am really struggling with discipline and I know this is a main topic of mine lately, but you ladies are are a wealth of wisdom for me. Our youth building has a platform too and he is wanting to get on that. I spent all of last night until it was time to go to nursery removing him and telling him no. He got very mad. Hubby started helping me out and was getting very upset because Hunter started pinching and being physical with hubby. He would not pop him because he had shorts on and didn't want him going to nursery with a red mark on his leg. But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed. I really don't want to cause a debate on spanking just want personal opinions. I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet. He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.

_____________________________

Chelle

<------- My Heart <3

"Friends are like bras: close to the heart and there for support."
Post #: 27
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:14:31 AM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 10688
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
Status: online
Yes, Manda.

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Does God see?

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen,
but on what is unseen. 2 Cor. 4:18
Post #: 28
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:19:12 AM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 10688
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
Status: online
quote:

Hubby started helping me out and was getting very upset because Hunter started pinching and being physical with hubby. He would not pop him because he had shorts on and didn't want him going to nursery with a red mark on his leg. But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed. I really don't want to cause a debate on spanking just want personal opinions. I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet. He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.


When Levi gets physical like that, if we're home, I say firmly NO BITE (or hit, or pinch, or pull hair) put him in the pack n play and let him scream (he loves the p n p when he's not in trouble, hates it when he is ). When we're out, he gets a light pop on the hand or bottom. Being that he's not my first, I don't care what anyone thinks anymore...I know I am disciplining, not abusing and some kids need to feel a bit of sting to get motivation to obey/behave. The squeezing his hand might work better for you in public. When my kids are older, I use the pinch the shoulder technique when they are not wanting to obey. Just enough to get their attention with the pain, and most people around don't have a clue, I don't think.

_____________________________

Does God see?

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen,
but on what is unseen. 2 Cor. 4:18
Post #: 29
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:59:18 AM   
peculiar_lady2


Posts: 12015
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: Between Hither and Yon
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: manda59

Hmmmm, just wondering if your stop-lights are what we call traffic lights?

are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.

quote:

But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed.

well since you asked, yes..IMO...and in our house...that behavior does warrant our attention to their backside in some cases...not all though...depending on the age. For Hunter's age, and at home, we tend to go another route (explained below)

quote:

I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet.

I suggest that if you don't want to discipline him there, then remove him to a place you can discipline him appropriately then go back when he is ready to try again.

quote:

He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.

there are very very few cases that I will spank a child that age...one is safety reasons...for instance...believe me, I don't care if you are going to call the cops on me or not, if my toddler decides to sit down in the middle of a parking lot and throw a fit because they don't want to walk or hold a hand, then they WILL get a swat...or if a toddler tries to touch a hot stove, they will get their hand swatted.
for aggressive behavior such as what you are describing...hitting, biting, head butting, hurting others....I remove them from the situation or person they are hurting...over and over if that's what it takes. Believe me, Jack is the most stubborn of ours so far, and he went through this one a few months ago. He would scream for upwards of two hours some times when he got mad and aggressive...throwing a fit cause he wanted his way. We would just have to let him scream and keep putting him on the floor over and over and over and over and OVER. I even got to the point that I wouldn't even let him come over to try to climb on my lap, I would gently push him back down to the floor with my foot, because he wasn't ready to stop hurting me yet. He had to stop screaming and stop hurting me...then he could get back on my lap. Usually we went round and round about seven or more times or him being able to get back up only to hurt me again and being put back down. Some nights I even had to wake Paul up to deal with it because he would hurt me so much (I have carpel tunnel and my wrists some nights can't take much). Anyway....it's normal for his age (and probably has a lot to do with his personality too...like I said, Jack is the worst out of all of mine so far, but really all of them have done it to some extent)

quote:

I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.

lol...it's not about getting it right, it's about finding what is right for THAT child in THAT situation!!!. Believe me, all that you are going through right now is normal for his age...he is learning that he can be independent and he is asserting and trying to figure out how far he can go. If he didn't do that then he would have no drive to be more independent...that's why God created the wonderful 2 and 3yo stages!!! They are working their way to being more on their own. By 4yo usually they are soooo different when it comes to things like this....they can do more physically (developmentally) and their brain understands more and connects things more, all because they have been allowed to find the boundaries that you set.


_____________________________

"Some [babies] are just so inexplicably persnickety and unpleasing that it's easy to imagine that they were not actually floating in amniotic fluid but in pickle juice!" -Maggie (3cappuccinosmom)
Post #: 30
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:00:05 AM   
manda59


Posts: 5210
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
If it was my child, I'd do the "very firm hand squeeze" and say no, and keep saying it. If necessary, I'd pick my child up and remove them from the room, or at least go and stand at the back with them. I wouldn't smack (your spank) in public.

I decided, before my first child was born, to never smack any of my children in front of anyone other than my dh (not even in front of a sibling), no matter what they'd done. I personally believe that it is humiliating, and having had humiliation used on me as a child, I didn't want any of them ever to feel like that.

_____________________________

"I have nothing to add, except to agree with Manda."
(agapetos, July 2008)
Post #: 31
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:03:55 AM   
manda59


Posts: 5210
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2
are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.



The order here in the UK is Red (stop), Red and Amber (be ready to go), Green (go), then Amber (be ready to stop), Red (stop).

_____________________________

"I have nothing to add, except to agree with Manda."
(agapetos, July 2008)
Post #: 32
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:06:09 AM   
peculiar_lady2


Posts: 12015
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: Between Hither and Yon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: manda59

quote:

ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2
are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.



The order here in the UK is Red (stop), Red and Amber (be ready to go), Green (go), then Amber (be ready to stop), Red (stop).

cool...that's how it was in Germany, and I grew to like it a lot!!! Over here it is red to green then green to amber before turning red (but you probably already knew that since you have been here before)

_____________________________

"Some [babies] are just so inexplicably persnickety and unpleasing that it's easy to imagine that they were not actually floating in amniotic fluid but in pickle juice!" -Maggie (3cappuccinosmom)
Post #: 33
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:08:56 AM   
manda59


Posts: 5210
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2
cool...that's how it was in Germany, and I grew to like it a lot!!! Over here it is red to green then green to amber before turning red (but you probably already knew that since you have been here before)


Actually, I don't remember much about the lights. I do remember being quite anxious at stop lights because of these people who'd come up to the car to sell roses or wash your windscreen (windshield).

Anyway, that's probably more appropriate for my Yanks thread in Home and Garden, lol.

_____________________________

"I have nothing to add, except to agree with Manda."
(agapetos, July 2008)
Post #: 34
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:09:52 AM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 10688
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
Status: online
I've never had anyone try to sell me anything at a light. Weird!

_____________________________

Does God see?

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen,
but on what is unseen. 2 Cor. 4:18
Post #: 35
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:17:53 AM   
peculiar_lady2


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From: Between Hither and Yon
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LOL...me either Donna. We have however contributed to the firemen when they stand out with their boots collecting money for donation to the Jerry Lewis telethon.
oh yeah....kids talk....ummm.....my KIDS love giving to the firemen when they collect money for Jerry Lewis....lol. The first time Jake did that I remember how beaming he was for the rest of the day cause he got to touch a fireman's boot....lol. He was 3 at the time.


_____________________________

"Some [babies] are just so inexplicably persnickety and unpleasing that it's easy to imagine that they were not actually floating in amniotic fluid but in pickle juice!" -Maggie (3cappuccinosmom)
Post #: 36
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:46:57 AM   
Mrs.Wifey


Posts: 5062
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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quote:


Any of you been involved with a program like that? As they get older they incorporate more and more physical activity which I like. I had to laugh as I was leaving and they got started with parachute time.


We are going to hopefully do Gymboree this summer along with swim lessons. Gabby will be about 9-10 months old by that time, we would have done it sooner but it just wasn't feasible time wise.

Another neat program is Kindermusik, if we had one locally I would do that over anything else.

_____________________________




Ryanne

Gabriella Alexis born 8-22-07!

The opinions stated in the above post are solely mine and in no way should they be
construed as offensive due to your own insecurity.
Post #: 37
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:52:24 AM   
Mrs.Wifey


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From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Flintejae

Amber - that cracked me up!

You ladies wont' believe what I did today. I managed to lock my baby and my dog in the car with the keys sitting on the front seat. My set of duplicate keys were in my purse... which was in the locked car. They were locked in there for over 20 minutes. I swear I thought that I was going to puke when I realized what I had done. Please tell me I'm not the only oen to do something so stupid? The car got damaged a bit prying the door back to get my keys. Jadon was sleeping at first, but then he cried and cried. I felt so helpless. He was so sweaty when he got out of there.


When that happens, CALL THE POLICE. A baby locked in the car, even if it was your doing, is considered an Emergency and they will be more then happy to help you unlock the car. I have not done it, but my SIL has and they were very pleasant about helping her out.

Other then that, I ditto everything Manda said to you

_____________________________




Ryanne

Gabriella Alexis born 8-22-07!

The opinions stated in the above post are solely mine and in no way should they be
construed as offensive due to your own insecurity.
Post #: 38
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:01:18 AM   
firefightermama


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From: Canada
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And the fire department has really cool tools to shatter a window! They could help out too!

Oh yeah, and boot drives gross me out...I hope they use new boots when they do that. LOL

Chase stood up in his crib for the first time this morning, he was so proud of himself when I came in!

_____________________________

~yolanda~

<-- Me and my baby boy :)



"I wish I was a glow worm, cuz glow worms are never glum.
How can you be grumpy when the sun shines out your bum?"
Post #: 39
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:01:43 AM   
Sideways

 

Posts: 2469
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: online
quote:

ORIGINAL: Georgia-Peach
He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.


Nathan was really biting badly yesterday, but not out of anger. I think he does it when he's tired or hungry, so I try and address those problems.

But yesterday when I was so tired I was falling asleep at the kitchen table, it was really bad. I always say "NO BITE!", and if he repeats then he gets a pop in the mouth, but yesterday I got so mad that I had to put him in his crib and walk away, or else I really might've been tempted to back hand him.

We'll both be okay, Chelle. Other children have survived first time moms before.
Post #: 40
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:03:20 AM   
firefightermama


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From: Canada
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Chelle, and Ruth...at least you're disciplining...kids that have no discipline make me

_____________________________

~yolanda~

<-- Me and my baby boy :)



"I wish I was a glow worm, cuz glow worms are never glum.
How can you be grumpy when the sun shines out your bum?"
Post #: 41
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:23:22 AM   
manda59


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Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
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quote:

ORIGINAL: firefightermama
Chelle, and Ruth...at least you're disciplining...kids that have no discipline make me



Similarly for me with kids who have too much ....

Both can be as damaged, in different ways.

_____________________________

"I have nothing to add, except to agree with Manda."
(agapetos, July 2008)
Post #: 42
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:34:59 AM   
RepentanceIsRequired


Posts: 929
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From: Home is where the heart is.
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Holy smokes this thread flies!

Jae- you are so not alone in locking the baby in the car. I did that with Zachary as a baby too. We were at like Sears talking about getting the tires changed, Ryan was out talking to the guy and I decided to get out and out of habbit I locked the doors. There Zachary was happy as a lark in the back seat.

Mary was a pro sleeper last night. She had a good four hour stretch. What is even better is that she does not need to be rocked to sleep. I put her down on her tummy and she will grunt a bit and go to sleep. It is so nice.


_____________________________

--Nicole--
"Icons, incense, chant...smells and bells...served up with tested sound theology, proven faith and a generous portion of beauty...that's home cooking to a hungry soul." -- unworthyseraphim
Post #: 43
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:52:38 AM   
3cappuccinosmom


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Janine--I have locked my kids in the car more than once.

One time, I was lucky a back window was open and I stuck a piece of lumber in and unlocked the side door. The other time, I stood by the car (which was running) for 40 minutes waiting for AAA to arrive.

I haven't shared all of the stupid things I've done. But I've done a lot. I know that sick feeling in the pit of the stomach all too well. Stuff happens even when we have the best of intentions.

On Jadon and independence--go back and read Manda's post a couple more times.
Babies aren't meant to be 'independent' at 2 months. He has a whole lifetime for that, and believe me, it will happen on it's own before you're ready.
You can start weaning him to his own bed now, if you have the heart for it. But if he's a baby who needs closeness, then doing that now will be a huge stressor for the whole family. I remember insisting to myself that i was going to train Biruk to sleep in his own bed very early on. Well, he's definately been a much better sleeper than the first two, but when it came down to it, I still picked sleep for both of us over midnight hours trying to sleep-train him. I don't know about others but the sleep thing got a lot easier for me when I could safely put my babies down on their tummies. They didn't startle themselves awake so often, and I could pat them on the back.

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"Children are durable and don’t necessarily wilt under adversity, just as our children don’t necessarily thrive under luxury and comfort." Garrison Keillor

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Post #: 44
RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 1:32:04 PM   
Flintejae


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Wow, thanks ladies. All of your comments and advice made a lot of sense.

Ryanne - I had a cop WITH ME (my neighbor) so that's why I didn't do that...

Donna - I didn't break the window because I knew Jason woudl be home any minute. The guys just got into the moment, I think, and didn't listen to me and damaged the car. Jason said he fixed it and I sure hope so.

Today is a new day. A new day.

Jadon's waking - I'll post more later...

_____________________________


- Janine

Our son, Jadon, was born on March 12th! Thank You, Lord, for Your Amazing Miracles!

Post #: 45