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RJR_fan -> RE: Meaning of Life = Unpredicability (5/30/2008 5:12:47 AM)
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quote:
What are some unpredictable events that happened to you that changed your life and gave you a new perspective? This might seem like small potatoes to folks who have endured real and visible trials in life, but this is a worthy topic of discussion, so it seems right to contribute. The most painful turning point in my life was a broken engagement 34 years ago. I'd been living my life according to the script penned by hagiographer Jamie Buckingham, a latter-day Horatio Alger whose heroes achieved their goals in life in the course of "living by faith." Give your whole life over to the Lord, quit your job, find some venue for "full-time ministry," and just watch the miracles unfold, one after another. After all, time is short, and only what's done for Christ will last. Eternal souls matter far more than mundane worldly concerns. My "Jesus Freak" adventures took me up and down the East Coast, and landed me in a Baptist street mission founded by a disciple of Francis Shaeffer. Several exciting years of ministry followed, feeding the hungry, clothing the tattered, visiting the prisoner, caring for widows (retirees) and orphans (street kids). The girl I was convinced had been provided by God to share in this adventure joined the commune for a few days, freaked out, and split. My life had diverged from the script. The second thing I'd most wanted from God (the first, of course, was a sense of being engaged in an important ministry) had materialized briefly, then been whisked away. A tantalizing glimpse of envisioned bliss, interrupted by cold realities. This did not compute. As a Catholic mystic said to Jesus, "Lord, if this is the way you treat your friends, then it's no surprise that you have so few of them!" I don't miss the girl; in fact, upon reflection, I barely knew her, and was infatuated with an imaginary creature projected upon this real human being. The broken story arc, however, was truly devastating. God had "broken the rules" -- as they existed in my mind, and guided my life. At which point, three facts gave me grace to keep moving forward: - God understands me, and has proven it -- by walking in my shoes (the Incarnation)
- God loves me, and has proven it -- by dying for my sins (the Atonement)
- God has power to help me, and has proven it (the Resurrection)
The facts abide, even when the faith and feelings turn traitor. How has this experience affected me? First of all, I made a sacred and solemn vow to the Lord to never place myself, or my family, at the mercy of some small ingrown "ministry." The million souls who "made a decision for Christ" at Billy Sunday's media events were less important than the three sons he sacrificed to his vision of ministry. If a church-provided "ministry opportunity" interferes with a planned family event, family trumps church. If someone testifies of "finding" the money to meet a building fund pledge by placing her kids in public school, I cut my pledge in half. True, I'd prayed about it, and a number had come to mind. But if the church is willing to accept/endorse/publish that kind of "sacrificial giving," where the children are sacrificed, then something is a bit out of plumb! On the positive side, God has provided a genuine friend for my one-way trip through life. Four passengers have come on board, two of whom are thriving adults now, two of whom are still being home schooled and enjoyed. God has given us a few Muslim families to love and enjoy. I've learned that data-skilled folks matter as much to the Kingdom as people-skilled folks. We all have our unique ways to serve God and man. I've been able to contribute to the home schooling movement with a master's thesis that is still being cited 16 years later. The term "Asperger's Syndrome" has allowed me to see what could have been, had God not intervened. Life is far different than I understood it to be way back then -- but far richer, far more wonderful, far more realistically related to the rest of humanity.
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