Eat It Or Go Hungry? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Life] >> Parenting



Message

raspberry331 -> Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 10:45:54 AM)

How do you handle food issues at your house? If your child does not like the meal you prepared, and you know ahead of time, will you make something extra they do like, or is it "eat or go hungry"?



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 11:36:34 AM)

I try to prepare more than one dish. Even if a child doesn't want stroganoff, for example, they can have plain noodles with butter and maybe parmesan. Or a child who doesn't like tacos can have a quesadilla (if he fixes it himself, lol, unless of course he's very young). So I guess what I am saying is that I allow the kids to customize the food that I cook for them.

I don't really have picky kids, but I definitely prefer not to make food a battle--I don't think it's healthy. However, I would never go so far as a gal I knew who prepared four different meals every single night for her family--she had catered to their pickiness for so long that she was then enslaved to it. I also know a girl who recently tried chinese food for the first time...and she is 16. Exposure to a wide variety at a young age is key, I think, to having an adult who will eat more than three or four different tried-and-true foods.



1love1God1way -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 12:40:32 PM)

I got the eat it now, eat it cold later, or go hungry.

I think it is a time-tested system that works.



MissGizmo -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 12:57:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way

I got the eat it now, eat it cold later, or go hungry.



Having gotten this told to me as a child, I would never tell it to my children. I would try within reason to find something for them even if it only was a PB&J sandwich.



NotDoneYet -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 1:00:58 PM)

For many years at our house, there have always been 2 choices for dinner, eat or starve. I try to remember preferences, within reason, although my drama queen (age 5) will occasionally decide that she doesn't like something she ate less than a week ago.
We don't have too many problems...

NDY



garsyt -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 1:07:32 PM)

IF I'm fixing a meal that the vast majority of the family likes but there is that sole person that doesn't, I'll make sure that at least one of the sides is something they like. I have one child that cannot handle the taste of cooked beans, as in lima, chili, baked that sort of bean. He has tried them a number of times in a number of different ways and I just simply choose NOT to fight that battle with him. He can eat a salad or a sandwich of cold cuts. I have a dd that doesn't like egg noodles so when we have stroganoff - she doesn't have to eat the pasta and can bake herself a potato instead, and eat that with the veggie side. BUT if it's a new dish - they have to at least give it a try, or they can wait for the next scheduled meal.

Blessings,

Garsy



BlessedMamaofmany -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 1:26:09 PM)

I make an effort to prepare at least one thing everyone will like...main dish or side. For example, my 4 really dislikes chicken, so on nights we have chicken, I make sure to make rice, since she loves that.
That being said, since I make an effort to make something that everyone can at least eat a bit of, the rule is, eat what I make, or don't eat.
Sandy



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 1:52:46 PM)

I fix one meal for everyone. I fix things that everyone likes and throw in side things of things that are new or that maybe some like and others aren't too fond of. I usually end up fixing two veggies for every meal (one everyone likes and one they don't or haven't had before) so that everyone cans still get the veggies without being forced to eat something they don't like or don't want that day. If you don't want what I fix for the meal then there is always the option of a sandwich, which we always have a plethora of options for. My kids are not picky by any stretch of the imagination...but there are some days that you just don't want to eat certain things, and I understand that...which is why they are always allowed to choose a sandwich instead.



quote:

ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way

I got the eat it now, eat it cold later, or go hungry.

I think it is a time-tested system that works.

we don't choose that method because we choose in our house to not make issues of food. Our kids don't have to eat everything on their plates if they aren't hungry...but they won't get another meal until the next meal time or snack time. Not everyone needs to eat the same amount at every meal...so a child (or even adult) simply not being as hungry this meal as they were last meal isn't good enough reason IMO to make them eat it cold later. That to me is cruel. I wouldn't want to do it...and I won't expect my kids to do it either.



Consecrated2God -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 2:15:58 PM)

quote:

If your child does not like the meal you prepared, and you know ahead of time, will you make something extra they do like, or is it "eat or go hungry"?


I generally don't make a dish I know that everyone hates. For one thing, my family likes my cooking. I occasionally have kids that will turn up their noses at something, but it's usually a certain ingredient they don't like, and if they want to pick out their meat or mushroom or something and give them to someone else, I don't have an issue with that. If it's something I know certain kids don't like, and they have a history of not liking it, I might serve two things and let them pick (such as peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or bologna sandwiches).

But in general, if I cook a meal and someone doesn't want it, and I know it's good food, I'm not going to cater to pickiness. Like today I made chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, and spinach. My 3-year-old didn't want to eat, and was saying that chicken was yucky. I know he likes chicken, he just didn't want it this time. I told him to try a bite anyway, and he liked it and ate all his food. I also do not let them take seconds of something if they haven't finished their firsts, and if I make a dessert, they have to finish their food first.



Ellie-Mae -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 2:18:25 PM)

We make one meal. We tend to give small servings so that they can finish and ask for seconds. They are not required to finish seconds. We don't really have a problem with them being picky. A few weeks ago Rebekah decided that she didn't like baby spinach. AS thought that we were mean because we made her eat it anyway (we just told her that she was going to eat it and she did). Anyway, a few days later she and her siblings are raiding the Fridge. What were they making? Pita pockets full of baby spinach and salad dressing. Rebekah even asked me for more and ran to make more. She was as excited as if I had said that she could make s'mores.

We rarely have trouble with a kid who does not want to eat dinner. Sometimes I do make things that I know that they don't care for. They usually eat it without a problem. I am not for sure why the kids are so easy about this. Maybe it is because they see the grown-ups eating things that they don't like sometimes. Maybe because it is only one meal and they know that they will eat something different next time.



shadowspring -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 2:46:38 PM)

This isn't a problem in my house anymore. Teens will eat almost anything. [8D]

But when they were growing up, if they didn't want what was served they could have either a bowl of cereal and milk or a PBJ.

The private Christian preschool my oldest attended taught her to say, "I don't care for that, thank you." when rejecting food, rather than making rude comments. I continued this practice. As long as they politely declined, they did not have to eat it.

I don't think it's a sin not to like something. As an adult I don't eat food I don't care for, so why force my kids? And not feeding them at all is not an option that I would consider. So that is how our family worked it out.



isaacsmom -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 2:54:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlessedMamaofmany

I make an effort to prepare at least one thing everyone will like...main dish or side. For example, my 4 really dislikes chicken, so on nights we have chicken, I make sure to make rice, since she loves that.
That being said, since I make an effort to make something that everyone can at least eat a bit of, the rule is, eat what I make, or don't eat. Sandy


Same here.



zoebob -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 2:57:41 PM)

I try not to make foods that someone doesn't like. however, there are a few dishes that most of us like but that one just doesn't. These are usually all in one dishes. When I make something like that and I know one child doesn't like it they can make ramen noodles or something. If it's something new I make them try it and if they give it an honest try they cna have fruit or yogurt or something.



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 3:04:43 PM)

Adding to my previous post: I did do the 'eat it, sit there till you eat it, or eat it again for breakfast' thing a few times when mine were younger and really regret doing so. Except with one child under one circumstance: Our Pizza princess went for days saying, 'No thank you, I only eat Pizza'. And I did let her go hungry, lol, and she wasn't even my child...but her mom was a good one, when she showed up after 10 hours and found her child had not eaten all day, she put her to bed without anything in her belly. After a few times it worked, lol. Only pizza...what a kid!



cindybode -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 3:37:26 PM)

We don't make food an issue. If you don't like what I made, you don't have to eat it, but I am not making something else. You are welcome to go to the kitchen and make yourself whatever you'd like to eat, as long as you clean up after yourself. If there's dessert, you're welcome to a reasonable serving whether or not you ate anything else, unless you are my hypoglycemic child who really needs some protein in his system before eating something sweet. If I've made something you've never had before, I do ask that you at least taste it, but that's it.



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 3:45:48 PM)

quote:

If there's dessert, you're welcome to a reasonable serving whether or not you ate anything else, unless you are my hypoglycemic child who really needs some protein in his system before eating something sweet

I heartily agree. And if you are MY hypoglycemic child, you already know that you will feel lousy if you do that. But I don't agree with labelling food and even worse, labelling people according to which food they did or did not eat (you are a GOOD GIRL for eating your meatloaf....now you have earned some BAD DESSERT [:@]) There is no better setup for an unhealthy relationship with food.



Roberta_ -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 4:20:09 PM)

J-10 only has about a dozen foods she likes, and they can't be touching.
J-8 only likes food that her mommy cooks.

Since I am not their mommy, I do not have a choice in what they eat or don't eat or when. They are usually allowed to eat junk foods until about 4:30 pm and then they aren't hungry at 5-6 pm when supper is served. Sis doesn't make them eat because they aren't hungry. Then about 8-9 pm, they will have a bowl of cereal - usually the kinds that are high sugar, low nutrition. Then she wonders why she can't get them in bed before 11 pm. [8|]



artemis -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 5:22:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
I also know a girl who recently tried chinese food for the first time...and she is 16.


I'm 28 years old and I've never eaten peas [&:] My mom doesn't like them and therefore never cooked them. I'd never had Chinese food until I was married. I still haven't had any "ethnic" food outside of American, Mexican, Italian and Chinese. But I'm the only one the seven kids in my family who is a picky eater now, even though none of us were exposed to more than about 15 dishes that my mom served when we were growing up.


As a child, we had the "you can't leave the table until you eat it" rule. We also had the rule that no one was allowed to leave the table until everyone had finished eating. It was hard to hold out on eating the food you didn't like when you had six angry siblings who wanted you to take those last two bites so they could go play [;)]



PrincessButtercup -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 7:31:28 PM)

My mom is big on the "eat it or go hungry" rule. She makes meals that dad likes, and we have to like it or just not eat. But I love meat and potatoes, so it's all good. [;)]

I had asked her once when I didn't particularly like something if she could make me something else. She informed that she's way too busy taking care of four girls and making just one meal to have time to make a whole other meal for just one person. It's not that she didn't care if we didn't like something, but that she didn't have the time to do all of that.



PrincessDonna -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 9:52:11 PM)

I try to accommodate things I know my kids don't like, within reason. For instance, only one of the kids likes chili, so if I make chili, I also make chicken nuggets or something for them. If there are things in what I make that they don't like (onions, peppers, mushrooms, etc), they may pick around those things. But other than that, I do expect that what I make for dinner will be eaten. If not, yes, they have gone to bed hungry.

I understand why some do not want to make food an issue, but I have one child who, if allowed, would never eat anything I make even if it was his favorite the day before, so we have had to come down hard on this issue with all the kids. Breakfast and lunch...they have a lot of choices. Dinner...they will eat what I make or they will not eat. We also had to put a time limit on it, or this particular child will sit at the table all night playing with his food. We give 20 minutes after everyone else is done and if not much is eaten...the plate is dumped and he goes to bed. I have only had to do this with the other kids once or twice before they get the picture, but this ONE KID is just stubborn in this area.[>:]



macokjc -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 10:19:19 PM)

I make one meal for my family of 6, and if they don't like it, they don't have to eat it. However, they get nothing else. I refuse to make more than one meal - even at lunch time. We don't do the finish your plate or eat it in the morning rule. I know that sometimes children just aren't hungry. I do try to have 1 meat, 1 starch, and 1 vegetable at every meal, so there is always something for somebody. If my child isn't crazy about chicken, but fills up on green beans, that's fine with me. One meal like that is not going to kill them. They are not allowed to say "yuck" or any variation of that. If they don't learn to eat what is served in my house, how are they going to learn to do it in somebody else's house. In my opinion, the only thing worse than a picky child is a whiny, picky, adult.



artemis -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 10:33:27 PM)

oh... we were also not allowed to leave the table and go play until we had cleared our place and thanked my mom for making dinner. Sometimes we were pretty grumpy about our "thanks," but we always said "Thank you for the supper, Mom," before we left the kitchen. My dad would have dragged us back in if we forgot [;)]



Roberta_ -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/15/2008 11:08:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: macokjc
They are not allowed to say "yuck" or any variation of that.


If we said that we didn't like something- my mom would give us another helping!

She did that until we all starting complaining about how much we didn't like ice cream, candy, cake ..... [;)]



Nicole21 -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 12:38:11 AM)

Well I was a very willful child and my mom didn't have much money so we ate what she served or we didn't eat. I am not picky as an adult and when my knew for sure that we didn't like something she always gave us an alternative. I have a 15 month old son and he hasn't gotten picky yet but when he does go through that stage it will be eat or go hungry. My sister feeds her daughter junk food all day long then gets upset when she won't eat dinner so she just gives her cerel thats not healthy



Roberta_ -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 12:46:23 AM)

Hi Nicole and welcome to the boards!



Page: [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>



Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition 2.5 ANSI