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RE: Angry Children - 7/8/2008 1:55:56 PM
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manda59
Posts: 5368
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
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Just wondering if you saw my post here:
quote:
ORIGINAL: manda59
quote:
ORIGINAL: TooLoudx4
But when I get angry with the kids I start yelling and they're yelling, and we all just have a hard time setteling down to some type of "normal" sounds.
When you yell, is it just normal conversation but louder, or do you say any things that you regret afterwards?
Working on controlling your own volume (and possibly what you say) might help your dd regulate her own behaviour. Have you talked to her at all about how she feels when you yell at her?
I see you have also said:
quote:
So I'm sure that she just takes alot of her cues (sp) from DH & me.
Would this be in yelling at each other (and name-calling or saying hurtful things?) within the hearing
of the children, or both yelling (and name calling, or saying hurtful things?) at the children?
_____________________________
"I think my computer needs a "What Manda just said" button." 1mlasp July 2008
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RE: Angry Children - 7/8/2008 4:12:56 PM
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buckifn
Posts: 1666
Joined: 5/23/2006
Status: online
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quote:
know of everything that she does and goes to. So I'm sure that she just takes alot of her cues (sp) from DH & me. What child doesn't mirror their parents.
Knowing where a child goes does not prevent sexual abuse and/or molestation from taking place. It often happens in the child's home right under the other family member's nose and they don't have a clue as to what is happening.
I suggest you take your child for an exam and also talk with her about this.
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RE: Angry Children - 7/8/2008 4:58:44 PM
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creationtalk
Posts: 583
Joined: 6/9/2005
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I have found that when I have the most trouble with my son--anger, bad behavior, what ever, it is usually when there is something in his life that is hurting him and he feels helpless to solve it or when he needs a lot of time and attention from me and hasn't been getting it because I'm too "busy". And the behavior will last as long as he is in this position or feeling this...and sometimes beyond when the acting out has become a habit.
I don't really know what to do or what might be causing this.
Maybe when things are relatively calm, you could ask her to write 5 things about her life that she would change if she could. Look them over to see if you can accomplish any of these. At least talk about them. She may feel that no one really sees her except when she is behaving poorly.
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RE: Angry Children - 7/8/2008 10:39:21 PM
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RepentanceIsRequired
Posts: 996
Joined: 9/14/2005
From: Home is where the heart is.
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quote:
Maybe when things are relatively calm, you could ask her to write 5 things about her life that she would change if she could. Look them over to see if you can accomplish any of these. At least talk about them. She may feel that no one really sees her except when she is behaving poorly.
This is a good idea. Also, have you had any alone time with her? Ryan and I always try to get one on one time with each kid.
_____________________________
--Nicole--
"Nauseatingly cute" -- Ryan's reaction to Mary's new pink sleeper.
"I didn't know mommies have magic eyes!" -- Rachael
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RE: Angry Children - 7/8/2008 11:06:39 PM
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mommyplus3
Posts: 53
Joined: 7/8/2008
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tooloud-
i don't have much advice...just <<hugs>>
some children are more explosive than others. i have a 13 (almost 14 - eek!) yo dd that had some of the same experiences that you have described...the awake ones ;o). she has long come out of that "stage", but i remember how helpless i felt.
my daughter seemed to even out more once she started her period. we lovingly called it the 2 year PMS. do you tend to have moodiness when your hormones fluctuate? i think that some of it can be hereditary...if so, maybe offering her an explanation as to why she is acting that way will help her. my daughter didn't like the way she was acting, didn't always realize she was doing it, and if she did, she couldn't always stop it. once we were able to pinpoint the issue, it gave us a lot more peace for everyone to deal with.
any of this make sense? i am soo weary and ready for bed  good luck and i will keep you in my prayers.
<3
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RE: Angry Children - 7/9/2008 1:21:31 AM
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TooLoudx4
Posts: 21
Joined: 3/1/2007
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Thanx mommyplus3, I think you might have hit the nail on the head on that one. Ya, that moodyness thing. I'm all over that one like a fly to a bug zapper. I guess I just needed someone to tell me that.
_____________________________
Happy Farmers Wife & Mom To KMCMM
K*S*U* Wildcats! Go State!
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RE: Angry Children - 7/9/2008 7:06:44 PM
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RepentanceIsRequired
Posts: 996
Joined: 9/14/2005
From: Home is where the heart is.
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That's a good point. If you are quick in your temper and lash out quickly, she will piick up on that and be more apt to do it as well. Keep looking to see how you can work on keeping yourself in check during those moments.
_____________________________
--Nicole--
"Nauseatingly cute" -- Ryan's reaction to Mary's new pink sleeper.
"I didn't know mommies have magic eyes!" -- Rachael
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RE: Angry Children - 7/10/2008 5:46:48 PM
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RepentanceIsRequired
Posts: 996
Joined: 9/14/2005
From: Home is where the heart is.
Status: offline
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Just checking in to see how things have been going.
_____________________________
--Nicole--
"Nauseatingly cute" -- Ryan's reaction to Mary's new pink sleeper.
"I didn't know mommies have magic eyes!" -- Rachael
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Yes, I have at times gone back and tried to converse more after I have calmed down, but just don't do it often enough.
