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Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/13/2009 10:29:57 PM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 3570
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This topic had been discussed extensively in the Singles folder so I'm not creating this to discuss your position on this issue. Since there were only a few men responded and gave their opinions, I thought I'd come here and post the questions where only men can respond.
Supposed you're still single and you're at the stage of your life where you're interested in meeting and dating women and getting to know if one would be a suitable partner for you. Supposed you saw a woman in a bookstore, (or a park, or cafe) whom you find attractive, not just physically, but she seems to have something about her. You have no clue if she's a christian, but you want to approach her and get to know her a bit to find out if she is or not. Then, you notice a ring which looks like a wedding band on her left ring finger.
1. What's the chance that you would still approach her to get to know her after seeing the ring on her finger?
2. Would you make an assumption that she is married/taken because of the ring?
Remember, there's no right or wrong answer and there's no discussion about whether approaching a stranger is proper or not.
_____________________________
Search me, Oh God, and know my heart
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me, and
Lead me in the way everlasting Psalm 139:22-24
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Go Steelers!!!
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 12:41:23 AM
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APZR
Posts: 1044
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From: GA
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quote:
1. What's the chance that you would still approach her to get to know her after seeing the ring on her finger?
None, notta, zilch.
quote:
2. Would you make an assumption that she is married/taken because of the ring?
YES... she's absolutely, positively, off limits... not even for casual discussion because she has a man for casual conversation, period. Not only no, but no Sir NO.
_____________________________
Ya can't keep trouble from visitin, but you don't have to offer it a chair.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 2:12:21 AM
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randomcollegestudent
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Chance I would approach her? Pretty close to zero.
Assume she was married/engaged/in a committed relationship? Probably.
To me, that is a very logical assumption.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 7:25:44 AM
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brianm73
Posts: 50
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No Way!!! That is the first thing I look for when checking out a women. If I find her attractive or think I might want to talk to her, I look at the left hand first.
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Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength, they will soar high on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint. In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 7:42:38 AM
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DaveW
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Approach her? Absolutely not.
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Avatar is my son Caleb and Leah on their wedding 12/20/09
We are now empty nesters.......
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Our CD is now available here:
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 7:58:21 AM
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buckifn
Posts: 1669
Joined: 5/23/2006
Status: online
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1. No, I would have no interest in getting to know someone based on seeing them once in a bookstore.
2. No, I would not be interested in dating someone who already has a wedding ring on her hand. If the ring had no meaning she wouldn't be wearing it imo.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 11:28:44 AM
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stamper_ben
Posts: 7877
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Lone Star State
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The ring is there because she is either currently in a relationship or wants to give the illusion that she is in one. So no, as someone who is not a womanizer I would stay away.
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We will be known as His by the love we show one another.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 11:52:12 AM
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rayofson
Posts: 10447
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Ditto
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Please don't feed the Ogre.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/14/2009 7:53:01 PM
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trainfan
Posts: 2801
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From: The land of confusion
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Tritto!
Since I tend to be shy in those situations I almost always look for a ring first. But I would also observe for a while just to see if she was with a guy who didn't happen to be in the area when I saw her.
_____________________________
Disappoints are inevitable, discouragment is a choice.
Dr. Charles Stanley.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 8:37:06 AM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 3570
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Thanks, guys. Keep 'em coming.
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable".
_____________________________
Search me, Oh God, and know my heart
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me, and
Lead me in the way everlasting Psalm 139:22-24
-------------------------------------
Go Steelers!!!
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 9:26:28 AM
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John_O
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I suppose you know how I'd respond to the original post 
quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Thanks, guys. Keep 'em coming.
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable".
I'd have doubts about dating someone who was wearing a ring when they weren't married. (some cases may have merit but I'd need to think about it a bit) To me it seems dishonest. Honesty ranks way way up there on my list of must haves. If she'd lie to me about being married in the first place (wearing a ring) what else would she lie about to me?
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 10:06:48 AM
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stamper_ben
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From: Lone Star State
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quote:
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable". In my view it would be more appealing, or honorable, if she were able to just be up front with those "certain men".
_____________________________
We will be known as His by the love we show one another.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 10:33:06 AM
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Qtman
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From: Crimson Tide Country
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Gentlemen if I may. You are being somewhat mislead. I do not think intentionaly but mislead just the same. The topic in the other thread is the wearing of any ring on the left hand ring finger. It did not have to even look like a wedding or engagement ring. This would alter my answer. Would this additional information have any bearing on the way you answered the OP?
_____________________________
Aufmerksamkeit: Es ist verboten, damit Qtman mit stummen Köpfen spricht.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:16:58 AM
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John_O
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Qtman
Gentlemen if I may. You are being somewhat mislead. I do not think intentionaly but mislead just the same.
Kind of like if a single woman was wearing a ring on her left ring finger?
quote:
The topic in the other thread is the wearing of any ring on the left hand ring finger. It did not have to even look like a wedding or engagement ring. This would alter my answer. Would this additional information have any bearing on the way you answered the OP?
Any ring on the left ring finger looks like a wedding ring.
Tell me, What exactly does a wedding ring look like? I've seen wedding rings made of gold, silver, platinum, coppery, pewterish looking, with stones, without stones, with designs, without designs. What does a wedding ring look like?
BTW, you didn't answer the question.
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:21:05 AM
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rayofson
Posts: 10447
Joined: 4/11/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable".
No.
_____________________________
Please don't feed the Ogre.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:24:29 AM
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APZR
Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: GA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Thanks, guys. Keep 'em coming.
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable".
How do you expect to attract an honorable man wearing a fake ring to lie about your marriage status? Honorable men will not approach, dishonorable men wouldn't care about your status even if the ring were real. As John O said, people use all kinds of different rings as wedding rings. My BIL, having been an avid duck hunter for many years, wears a duck tag as his wedding ring. So ANY ring on the ring finger equals off limits.
_____________________________
Ya can't keep trouble from visitin, but you don't have to offer it a chair.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:25:13 AM
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Qtman
Posts: 5927
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From: Crimson Tide Country
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quote:
ORIGINAL: John_O
quote:
ORIGINAL: Qtman
Gentlemen if I may. You are being somewhat mislead. I do not think intentionaly but mislead just the same.
Kind of like if a single woman was wearing a ring on her left ring finger?
quote:
The topic in the other thread is the wearing of any ring on the left hand ring finger. It did not have to even look like a wedding or engagement ring. This would alter my answer. Would this additional information have any bearing on the way you answered the OP?
Any ring on the left ring finger looks like a wedding ring.
Tell me, What exactly does a wedding ring look like? I've seen wedding rings made of gold, silver, platinum, coppery, pewterish looking, with stones, without stones, with designs, without designs. What does a wedding ring look like?
BTW, you didn't answer the question.
And I am not going to answer the question John. But I did want to make sure the men knew what the question really was.
_____________________________
Aufmerksamkeit: Es ist verboten, damit Qtman mit stummen Köpfen spricht.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:28:18 AM
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rayofson
Posts: 10447
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quote:
Honorable men will not approach, dishonorable men wouldn't care about your status even if the ring were real.
Good point.
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Please don't feed the Ogre.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:29:02 AM
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stamper_ben
Posts: 7877
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Sam, I agree with John. What's a wedding or engagement ring look like? They could be anything from a cigar band to a 15 pound multi-colored rock.
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We will be known as His by the love we show one another.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:32:27 AM
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rayofson
Posts: 10447
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The only time that I can think of that would be acceptable for an unmarried woman to wear a wedding ring is if she very recently lost her husband. That I can understand.
_____________________________
Please don't feed the Ogre.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 11:51:44 AM
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Qtman
Posts: 5927
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From: Crimson Tide Country
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quote:
ORIGINAL: stamper_ben
Sam, I agree with John. What's a wedding or engagement ring look like? They could be anything from a cigar band to a 15 pound multi-colored rock.
That's cool Ben. Let me see if I can explain my position.
First I AM married. And happily so I might add. So I do not pay particular attention to what a women has on any of her fingers. I am not interested in forming any relationship where that would even matter.
However, when I was single I did pay attention to such details. I have never been one, nor do I remember a single time, to see a woman in the mall and say Wow I think I will go ask her out. I have never dated anyone I did not know a little about. If I was looking for some one that I might be interested in dating and saw what I know is a wedding or engagement ring on their left ring finger my plans would change suddenly. But, if they had say a college ring on that finger I would proceed with the become acquainted part. At some time during this I will know if they are available or not. I think most of the men on here know enough about wedding and engagement rings to make a casual glance and tell if a woman is wearing on. If it is something unusual, a mickey mouse ring, etc., then find out. That's is all I am saying. Any ring does not mean unavailable to me. And it does not have to be on the left hand. My wife for example has arthritis in her hands. It is worse in her left hand. So sometimes if she does not have her rings on it is because she couldn't get them on. So she may have them on the right hand or on a chain or they may still be in the jewelry box. But I think it is best that I just leave this alone.
< Message edited by Qtman -- 4/15/2009 12:38:44 PM >
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Aufmerksamkeit: Es ist verboten, damit Qtman mit stummen Köpfen spricht.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 12:33:47 PM
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stamper_ben
Posts: 7877
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From: Lone Star State
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I have answered the question posed hypothetically as I too am married, and have been for over 30 years. Truth be known, I don't look at women's fingers at all! When I was single I was a teenager as I have been with my wife since I was 19. At that age just about ALL of the girls were single. So rings didn't play into any part of the "looking" ritual.
When I meet women now, I too am not interested in forming a relationship where her marital status would matter. Heck, I wouldn't even know how to begin to do that!
When I come here to the He Says folder I pick and choose what questions I can answer. Those asked to get the opinion of obviously single men I stay away from as I can't answer them. Some, like this one where I can give a hypothetical answer, I can try to give my input. The success rate varies...
Blessings...
_____________________________
We will be known as His by the love we show one another.
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 1:41:40 PM
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Child4Jesus
Posts: 383
Joined: 5/24/2005
From: Long Island, Nassau, Elmont, NY
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Thanks, guys. Keep 'em coming.
Another question. Would you find it appealing, or honorable if a woman wears a fake wedding band on her finger to keep certain men away but would actually like to be known and pursued by men she considers "honorable".
She can't have it both ways. Having the ring will keep all guys away except the real jerky ones. The honorable ones will see the ring and not even approach you. I don't find it appealing or honorable for a woman to wear it. It not only gives of a lie but also a false sense of security to the woman. For me if a woman doesn't want to talk to me just say so.
_____________________________
In Christ,
Richad
The greatest heresy to American Christianity is that if you ask Jesus to come into your heart, he definitely will.
Paul Washer
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 1:43:27 PM
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Child4Jesus
Posts: 383
Joined: 5/24/2005
From: Long Island, Nassau, Elmont, NY
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Qtman
Gentlemen if I may. You are being somewhat mislead. I do not think intentionaly but mislead just the same. The topic in the other thread is the wearing of any ring on the left hand ring finger. It did not have to even look like a wedding or engagement ring. This would alter my answer. Would this additional information have any bearing on the way you answered the OP?
No it would not change my answer.
_____________________________
In Christ,
Richad
The greatest heresy to American Christianity is that if you ask Jesus to come into your heart, he definitely will.
Paul Washer
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RE: Ring on the left ring finger....... - 4/15/2009 3:24:49 PM
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iwillfearnoevil
Posts: 3258
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From: upstate NY
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Qtman
Gentlemen if I may. You are being somewhat mislead. I do not think intentionaly but mislead just the same. The topic in the other thread is the wearing of any ring on the left hand ring finger.
i'm not sure i'd be able to tell exactly the nature of a ring, thus to me most rings may appear to be wedding related. also from a thread my fiancee created in women only (before and unrelated to the thread everyone is alluding to), it appears a lot of women just wear a band and no diamond which clouds things too. i could guess at a class ring depending on how close i got, but who's to say it's not her boyfriends ...
i was never one to approach a random girl to ask out for a date either though so i may not be part of the target audience for this thread ...
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