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teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 5:28:40 PM
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JnJs_mom
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I told him no of course. Then I started to wonder if I am being too old fashioned. It wont change my no but am I too old fashioned?
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 5:40:32 PM
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hlyfvrd1
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Have you thought to ask him why? My son has mentioned this before, and I told him that it was out of the question. Nowadays, we want to do this because they're fashionable or because someone else is doing it. We never think about the PURPOSE it serves. You know?
You're not being old-fashioned 
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 7:30:16 PM
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IonMoon
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Leslie_JnJs_mom
I told him no of course. Then I started to wonder if I am being too old fashioned. It wont change my no but am I too old fashioned?
Personally, I don't get the "of course." I don't know that it is old-fashioned, per se, but I don't see it as a big deal whatsoever.
It wasn't even a big deal when I was a teen...
Would you feel the same way if it was a daughter? Why/why not? What exactly is your objection?
Tara P
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 7:32:48 PM
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2shaye
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rainbowtvp
quote:
ORIGINAL: Leslie_JnJs_mom
I told him no of course. Then I started to wonder if I am being too old fashioned. It wont change my no but am I too old fashioned?
Personally, I don't get the "of course." I don't know that it is old-fashioned, per se, but I don't see it as a big deal whatsoever.
It wasn't even a big deal when I was a teen...
Would you feel the same way if it was a daughter? Why/why not? What exactly is your objection?
Tara P
That was going to be what I said!
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 7:41:20 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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I have no kids, so read no further if you choose.
I really believe these kinds of things are the things NOT to fight over. I'd rather have a kid with an earring who was doing other things he was supposed to do, then a preppie looking kid that was really secretly smoking marijuana all the time. Believe me, my college was like that..the most clean cut on the surface were the ones that were really sneaking around breaking the rules.
Now, my next statement my come across as contradicting myself but although I don't mind an earring on a guy, I strongly dislike ear gauges. They gross me out, and I think that is going TOO far in distorting the human body.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 8:29:41 PM
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manda59
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Well, since my dd had her ears pierced at 10, I don't think I could have been justified in having an objection to my son having had an ear pierced, had he wanted it done.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 9:02:36 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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I think that depends, Manda. You would also buy her a training bra at that age, but you would not buy your son one. If someone really believes that pierced ears are a female thing, then not letting their son pierce his ears makes sense.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/7/2008 9:17:06 PM
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Sideways
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I girl might need a bra; she certainly does not need an earing. Though, there are those who believe that any type of jewelry, outside perhaps a wedding ring, is for females only.
It's not a hill I would die on, but I can understand why more conservative families would be squeamish about it. I would probably make any child of mine wait, to see if it's a passing fancy or if they really wanted it. I would also ask why they wanted it so much.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 9:59:56 AM
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iluvatar
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Sideways]
I would probably make any child of mine wait, to see if it's a passing fancy or if they really wanted it. I would also ask why they wanted it so much.
Earrings are also non-permanent. You can take it out and the hole will fill in.
-Dan.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 10:08:21 AM
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MC4JC
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No you are not old fasioned. I'm against pierced ANYTHING (male or female). If God wanted more holes in our bodies, then he would have put them there :)
My son mentioned it one time - told him that I would not let him - when he was over 18 and out of the house, it was up to him, but I didn't approve of it.
BTW he's 21 now and no earrings :)
< Message edited by MC4JC -- 7/8/2008 10:14:30 AM >
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 10:13:26 AM
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csl7037
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
quote:
ORIGINAL: Sideways]
I would probably make any child of mine wait, to see if it's a passing fancy or if they really wanted it. I would also ask why they wanted it so much.
Earrings are also non-permanent. You can take it out and the hole will fill in.
-Dan.
This is exactly the deciding factor for me in any questions of teenage fashion or whim - if it's not permanent, it's not worth the argument for me. Earrings, funky hair, even clothes I don't like (excluding issues of modesty), are not hills I'm willing to die on. Tattoos I have a real issue with. And overboard piercings would simply be more than I could live with. But there are so much bigger issues to be concerned with, IMO.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 10:54:52 AM
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JnJs_mom
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He wants one because he thinks it is cool. He is 15 if you are wondering. My mom let me get my ears pierced when I was a pre teen. I had nothing but trouble with them due to infections. I do not plan on making the same mistake. So no my daughter will not get her ears pierced until she is old enough to really take care of them.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 11:29:49 AM
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Jenny-Fair
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quote:
Earrings are also non-permanent. You can take it out and the hole will fill in.
I would not agree with that. I wear earrings maybe once a year, and in my second holes, which I wish I had never gotten, maybe once every 2 or 3 years, and the holes are STILL there and useable.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 11:51:06 AM
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HenriettasCat
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Well, if you lived here I would say 'old fashioned' - like my mums era - she is 65.
I don't think our children should have to conform to our fashion anyway. The only thing I'd object to is immodesty. I don't consider an earing to be immodest or immasculine.
We had a student live with us for 5 months and he had about 7 rings - several on his ear, one on his eybrow - I can't even remember where the others were (after a while I stopped noticing them). He was a lovely lad and although my children were inquisitive and asked him questions about them, they totally accepted him as he was. I thought it was neat for them to see that people can look 'different' yet still be acceptable.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 1:42:44 PM
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Bagel
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If my son wanted one, I would tell him to wait until he's 18, when he doesn't have to have a parent sign the waiver for it. My husband recently pierced his ear so it wouldn't surprise me if one day my son wanted one.
I don't mind one or two holes in the lobes for girls, but too many piercings is a bit much I think. I have two piercings in each lobe and I just wear little posts in the second ones. Now my sister has piercings (as of this writing) in her nose, 4 or 5 in each ear (including areas where there is cartilage-ouch!) and one in her navel. She used to have one in her tongue but took that one out when she got married. Her reasoning? "Well I figured I gotta grow up sometime".
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 1:48:25 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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I suppose that's good...now she won't teach her kids to talk with a lisp! LOL
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 5:07:46 PM
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Bagel
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Watch her boy rebel and be free of piercings or tatoos.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 7:53:10 PM
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NotDoneYet
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All I can say is pick your battles...
What is an absolute and what isn't? Ear piercing...not an absolute. Respectful attitude, absolute. School and chores, absolute. Hair length...not absolute.
Figure out what is worth putting your foot down about. Don't put it down over everything, let the kid breathe a little...really, it won't kill 'em.
NDY
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/8/2008 8:24:29 PM
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Bagel
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I would agree. However, as long as they are under 18, I still have a say. If they want to pierce or tatoo themselves, they can wait until they are of legal age.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 12:42:51 AM
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relady
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quote:
If God wanted more holes in our bodies, then he would have put them there :) Hmmm, kinda like if God had wanted us to fly he would have given us wings? I assume you've never been on a plane.
quote:
He wants one because he thinks it is cool. He is 15 if you are wondering. It is very cool, especially if you're 15. And he is way more than old enough to care for them properly. My son got his first pierced ear at 10 and managed to take pretty good care of it with a little help from me.
quote:
I don't think our children should have to conform to our fashion anyway. THank you, thank you, thank you. Could not agree more.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 1:09:49 AM
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ladyingrace1979
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My husband is 48 years old and a worship pastor. He has one and it didn't turn him into a rebellous teen. There are a lot and I mean a lot worse things he could want. I would set some ground rules, he would have to take care of it, the earing would have to be fairly small and tasteful.
You know your son, if you think this is just a passing urge, then make him wait a while. If you think he is doing for rebellion then don't let him. But other than that I don't have a big issue.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 9:33:28 AM
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IonMoon
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When my kids were younger I said no piercings until 18. My ds had asked for one at one point and I said no and he ended up changing his mind.
My dd wanted her's done and it came up often, though she didn't bug me about it. I changed my mind and let her get them done. It was something important to her, the desire had been persistent, and she was a good kid. But I said that was the only one until she's 18...
BUT she has really wanted more. She has had magnetic jewelry which was a good compromise, because it wasn't permanent and she could get creative with it.
Again, she didn't bug me about it, but she did ask recently for another ear piercing and I allowed it, because of the same reasons as before- she was mature in her approach about it, she was persistent in her desire (it wasn't a whim), it meant enough to her to save her own money/wait patiently.
I would have changed the rule for my ds, too, if he hadn't changed his mind.
I have known lots of pierced/tattooed people who lived a clean life... And have known lots of clean cut church kids who were downright dangerous. So, to me this is not a big issue.
Tara P
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 9:36:56 AM
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HenriettasCat
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My main issue with a tongue ring is the damage they do to the teeth - it is for that reason I would not wish my son to have one. Same goes for any other area of the body (such as top of the ear) where serious damage can occur.
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